Does Truth Matter?


Does Truth Matter?

As a person who thinks about everything, I am often isolated and left to think on my own. I suppose a side effect of this is that I am quite ignorant of what it is other people are thinking about(if they are indeed thinking at all). I do not want to make any strong statements right now because I KNOW I am confused. However, I find it quite helpful to share my thoughts about things on my blog and videos. Not because I am trying to convince people to believe, think, or behave the same way I do, but because I am actually interested in other people. This is something entirely new to me because I have mostly been a selfish jerk.

I cannot exactly explain why I suddenly have an interest in reading or listening to other people talk, but I do have one theory. In my thoughts about death and the afterlife, I had been seriously considering what future I could choose for myself if I had the power to choose. After much thought, I realized that I had no desire to live forever. I would much prefer non-existence over any type of heaven or hell that I’ve ever heard described. The main reason being that since I am not exactly a social creature, the idea of being around other people FOREVER scares me to no end. I just don’t think I have the capacity for eternal life. It’s not that I reject the possibility of an afterlife but I don’t think it’s what works for me.

Not that I actually get a choice as far as I know, but it is fun to think about. Just imagining that I would cease to exist somehow makes life easier to deal with. I can be a lot more patient with people as long as I know that my interaction with them is temporary. A temporary life is a lot like a video game. You can get enjoyment out of a single video game for many years, but eventually there comes a time when you have tried just about everything and would gladly pass it on to someone else who can experience it for the first time. I am perfectly fine with knowing a game or movie has an end. I have no evidence to back up a belief in this form of death where one actually stays dead. It’s just a nice thought which I learned about by reading what atheists have to say on the subject.

But more importantly, my current belief I have is that the truth is highly unlikely to change. For example, if God exists, then he wouldn’t stop existing just because I stopped believing he existed. It’s kind of like the way that some people who have known me my whole life are now ignoring me as if I didn’t exist, but I am still here.

While I am searching for the truth about the questions I have, I try not to be overly concerned about it because obviously, in time the truth will be revealed. Why it can’t happen now is totally beyond my understanding. Maybe, at this time, I cannot accept the truth, but the day may come when that changes.

However, I am not saying that it doesn’t matter at all what people believe. Obviously, when people believe a lie, they do things which are a complete waste of time or money. For example, if they think that buying flowers and placing them on the grave of a dead person will actually make a difference to that person, then they have completely thrown away money that may be used to prevent the death of another.

So I am convinced that learning the truth is better for the world as a whole even if it offers no comfort to the individual who is looking for it. I am impressed with people who do not limit what they listen to or read.

Should Math Be Taught in Schools


Should Math Be Taught in Schools

I recently came across a very thought provoking video on youtube.

This video made me think very deeply. As an extreme math nerd, I have noticed that “math” is such a controversial word with different meanings to different people. Even though I love arithmetic and geometry, I feel bad when I know that such things are forced on people who don’t enjoy them.

It is often very hard to communicate exactly what I mean when I talk about math. I have come to realize that my entire system uses only a tiny portion of what people call math. I could almost say that math is a religion. There are parts of it I believe in and other parts I don’t. For example I believe in whole numbers or integers but not irrational numbers such as Pi or the square root of two. I believe in circles because I cannot deny the fact that I see them all the time. But I don’t accept the silly formulas about calculating the area or circumference of them.

But how can I explain my reasons for accepting and rejecting these different things I have learned from various sources? Basically I think it is a matter of relevance. Since I only care about drawing the circle or counting the number of any object, I find anything else irrelevant. This can apply to any subject. I will only remember information which can be used for something I want to do. I think that basic arithmetic and learning to read and write are the only subjects that should be taught in any type of school. Anything else people want to learn they can learn from books, videos, or direct experience. We live in a time when information can be spread through the internet faster than ever before. This is what gives me some hope that generations to come may have a chance to grow up more educated.

Death Phase


Death Phase

It has been a long time since my last blog post. I have been wanting to write something but never could find the time. Between learning PostScript, helping my mom publish her poetry book, working at HyVee, and listening to The Thinking Atheist, I haven’t really been able to write much.

Part of the problem is I’m just such a perfectionist. I want to make sure I say something important that will make people think and impact their life in a positive way. The only issue is that I am not exactly what anyone would call “positive”. In fact, it is the depressing subjects that no one is willing to talk about that I find myself thinking about. However, this is what makes me different from others. I find a great joy in the subjects of geometry, arithmetic, religion, death, and sex.

It’s been a little over a year since I left the messed up church I used to go to. I have been left alone by the people who I thought were my friends. At the same time, I have had a great time working at HyVee. The employees are polite and I am always aware of what is on sale because I see people buying it.

What people would never guess is that I am constantly thinking about death. I find it ironic that people’s greatest concern in life is whether the Chiefs win a football game. Another thing is the way people talk so much about food. I like food as much as anyone but I would rather eat than talk about it. At such things I can only laugh.

When I die, it really won’t matter how many carts I bring in or how much money I make. While I work to earn the money, I also realize that it is no longer my main goal. I have become more interested in talking to the people I work with. I was never very social but after being in front of hundreds of people while working around 20 hours per week, I’m getting good at understanding them. Sure there are some things that I will never understand, but basically I now see them as being very much like me. One thing that we all have in common is that we will all die.

People avoid the subject of death. The controversy over what happens after people die is extreme. I used to read about the different theories of various religions and wonder which is true. No one has any answers to my basic questions about why people are born, then live such a short time before dying. People are afraid of the unknown, but if they avoid the subject, then I can promise it will remain unknown.

The great irony is that those most qualified to tell us the truth about death are all dead already. It’s not very often that people come back from the dead and write books explaining everything. Even if they claim to have died and have a story, I would not trust a person I don’t know. I know that most people are liars. What they say and what they do are completely different.

For me personally, I have been thinking a long time about my own death and wondering what will happen to me. Eventually, I came to the conclusion that there isn’t really much I can do about it. I didn’t choose to be born on this planet and start the life I am stuck in right now. I see no reason that I would get much choice in the next life if there is one.

You could say that I’m having a death phase right now. It started as I began questioning everything I used to think was true.

I used to believe I was a Christian, I had asked Jesus into my heart more times than I remember. I was never sure if I was believing the right way or had enough “faith”. I tried my very best to be like the other people in church who called themselves Christians but then one day it hit me that I was trying to please THEM. I was not serving God or myself. I’m too honest to play the game other people are playing. I know that I will not earn any reward by pretending I believe in their God or agree with the sick twisted things they teach about sex and money.

I am not an Atheist either though. I believe there is a creator. For lack of a better term I may still refer to it as God. I say “it” because I don’t think of God as being either male or female. I don’t even view God as being very much like a human. After all, if he is the creator of the other animals as well, then doesn’t that mean that God must also meow like a cat, bark like a dog, moo like a cow, or oink like a pig? Humans have a very unrealistic view of themselves as being superior to other animals. They even think they are superior to other humans.

If I find other people who accept me as I am and are willing to talk about anything and laugh along with me, then I will have found some true friends. If that fails, maybe I will just adopt a cat.