Santa Claus should stay out of town

Santa Claus should stay out of town

I know that this sounds irrelevant to many people, but after hearing this song at work constantly, I have something to say.
Below are the lyrics to “Santa Claus Is Coming to Town”. Read them if you’ve never heard them and then scroll down for my comments.

You better watch out
You better not cry
Better not pout
I’m telling you why
Santa Claus is coming to town
He’s making a list
And checking it twice;
Gonna find out Who’s naughty and nice
Santa Claus is coming to town
He sees you when you’re sleeping
He knows when you’re awake
He knows if you’ve been bad or good
So be good for goodness sake!
O! You  better watch out!
You better not cry
Better not pout
I’m telling you  why
Santa Claus is coming to town
Santa Claus is coming to town

There is something really creepy about this Santa guy who is watching me sleep. It makes me feel the need to watch out and also makes me want to cry. While I am pretty sure that I will never encounter this Santa Claus guy but if I did then he WILL find out how naughty I can be! What is this list he is making? What purpose does he have? Since he already knows “if you’ve been bad or good” then he can’t really “find out who’s naughty or nice”. He already seems to know everything. The song contradicts itself in many ways.

Suppose you were a person from a culture who had never heard of Santa Claus. What general impression would you have given this song alone? It is quite bizarre even as it is. If it’s not enough to scare you, you can always consider that your Grandma might get run over by one of the flying reindeer who pulls Santa’s sleigh. If I had the time to waste, I could probably go into the story of how Santa Claus is based on Saint Nicholas who died December 6th in the year 343. I don’t know the whole history but I feel no need though as I am sure there are entire books written about the historical man as well as the fictional man.

The reason I complain about Santa Claus is not because I have something against fictional characters but because between thanksgiving and christmas, Santa Claus is EVERYWHERE! Pictures, movies, songs, and even facebook posts by some people I know. If the easter bunny were this popular, I would probably be concerned about that.


Author: chandlerklebs

I have unusual thoughts on almost every subject. I am as Pro-Life as I can possibly be. I am strongly opposed to violence of any type. That includes rape, war, and (obviously) abortion. Everything I think, speak, and write must be filtered by the effect it could have on the lives of others. If I am in any way promoting violence accidentally, please let me know.

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