According to my WordWeb dictionary, the first definition given is “Stop blaming or grant forgiveness”. Since I already wrote about why blame is irrelevant, I can now fully understand forgiveness.
To forgive someone simply means to not blame them. It simply does not help to blame someone and it does not solve problems. It changes the subject and the problem goes unnoticed. When I say that I forgive someone, I mean that I have decided to stop being so irrelevant!
Forgiveness in no way will stop pain. Forgiving someone who played a part in hurting me does not heal me. This is true in the same way that forgiving a murderer will not resurrect those they have killed. There is nothing magical about forgiveness.
I am sure that there are some hurts that I will suffer from for the rest of my life. This is directly relevant to why I have the power to speak against the very same things that hurt me.
I forgive all those who have hurt me in my life, but I will not let them continue doing the same things to other people. I will do what I can to end all forms of violence. Some abuse is physical, some is sexual, and some may even be spiritual. If it hurts someone in whatever way, it must be stopped.